So Ian and I were trying to figure out what everybody was so angry about, and Ian floated the very interesting theory that they were just pissed because there’s no Phish show in the near future…
I mean come on, people. Here you are, driving to DC in your SUVs, wearing your Nikes and Timberlands and J Crew outfits, which frankly don’t really go well with a gas mask (by the way). And you’re coming here waving banners that say “Capitalism Kills.” Well unfortunately, this is the best agument ever to discount Darwinism. Only the strong survive? Clearly these people are too stupid to know what they’re talking about. Capitalism Kills? It seems to be doing a pretty good job for you and your family.
So what do they do when they get here? First stop? The Gap. Now admittedly, the Gap owns Old Navy and is technically responsible for putting that woman with the enormous glasses on TV to haunt us, and they gave us the “everybody in…” campaign and now they’re mocking West Side Story. Clearly, the Gap is an evil place. But when all is said and done, there’s really no reason to prevent law-abiding citizens from going about their business (while driving up Wisconsin Ave) so that you can attack the Gap wearing nothing but a grass skirt. What does this accomplish? I mean…if you want a pair of draw-string cargo pants and a tec-vest, it’s best not to wait for a court order to get them. We all know that when you’re sitting in the campus bar telling this story while drinking some (non-union) beer on all you can drink open keg night, people will think you’re cool because you got on TV – not because you showed THE MAN how well hung you may or may not be while wearing your grass skirt.
Of course, this is all our parents’ generation’s fault. Maybe if we hadn’t grown up hearing about how important it was to believe in things and protest for social justice, these kids wouldn’t feel that they had to make stuff up to protest.
Now I don’t doubt that some of these people are legit social activists who know and care about the issues. Don’t get me wrong on that. But they’re not the ones getting arrested with Molotov cocktails in their bags. These people are the ones who are lobbying their Representatives and Senators in Congress. You can tell which ones they are because they’re less angry and more civil. They want to explaing things to you. And they don’t drive SUVs.
But enough ranting. I haven’t even been drinking, yet.
Two very important sound clips.
The first comes courtesy of Mark Kornblau. With Passover coming, he sends this gem for everyone’s enjoyment. Click on the music section, and then on Dayenu. We all love Dayenu.
The second come from one of the protesters that actually knows what he’s talking about. The clip below comes from George Becker. George is international President of the United Steelworkers of America. He asks the question that we all know the answer to. 9:30. Toledo Lounge. It’s your last chance to drink fermented grain products before Passover.