Ever played Grand Theft Auto 3? For those of you who haven’t, here’s the gist: you are a low-end punk working your way up the ranks of a crime organization by means of vehicular homicide, stashing bodies, and general murder and mayhem. I find GTA3 hilarious. It’s a great way to blow off some steam. It is just too ridiculous to be taken seriously.
But of course people do.
And then the fun police come and start breaking down doors and replacing all those cool toys with My Little Ponies and video games that Ned Flanders would approve of.
Check out this article for more on the fun. I especially like the Post’s comparison of GTA3 to Pac-man: “In today’s virtual mean streets, Pac-Man wouldn’t last a day. The yellow sphere with the slanted pie-hole that gobbled up pellets back in the ’80s probably would get carjacked and beaten to a yellow wad of pulp.”
What does this all have to do with the President? I’m glad you asked. The way I figure it, the W, even with his month long vacation, has not really relaxed in a while. It might be nerves over the fact that he is, in fact, President, and scares even him. It might be that Ashcroft has become insistent that Bush proves he’s Christian and not Muslim. Who knows?
But one thing I do know is that he needs to blow off steam. Having seen footage from the Gulf War, Daddy’s video game war, I think W has found his way to relax. He’ll get hisself a big ole war too. And it’s gonna be a great sequel, cuz’ the bad guy from Daddy’s war is still the bad guy. This time there’ll be a killer soundtrack, way cooler graphics, and none of that Declaration of War stuff that Congress keeps griping about. It’ll be so cool.
Tell ya what, I’ll offer the Pres any game he wants, in fact, I’ll buy him a whole gaming station, if he promises to respect the Constitution and get a Declaration of War for when he needs a rating boost and goes after Saddam Hussein.